Joke A Day's Little Johnny Jokes

All Joke A Day e-books contain MATURE MATERIAL and are not meant for those easily offended.

Each zip file contains e-books in the Palm OS format, Microsoft Reader LIT, and Adobe PDF files. Just unzip and load the one you need!

Joke Samples

A Sunday school teacher asked her class, Does anyone know Jesus' Mother's name?

Susie raised her hand and said, It was Mary. The teacher said, Very good Susie. Do you know Jesus' Father's name?

Little Johnny said, Yes, it was Verg. The teacher asked how he came up with that answer. He said, You know, Verg 'n Mary.

They came back the next day and still no one knew the answer. Look, said Mr. Dickson while holding his index finger against his thumb, forming a little zero. This is one hole, my nose has 2 holes, and I can put my hand over my nose and make my nose holes appear inside this other hole.

Aaaaaaahhhhhh, said the children. The next day, Little Johnny stood up and said, Mr. Dickson, my daddy wants to know if you know how to put 7 holes in 1 hole.

Hmmmm, he thought, How can you put 7 holes in 1? Well, I'll be darned; I don't know how to do that. Um, did your father tell you how to?

Yes, said Little Johnny, You take a flute and shove it up your ass!

Little Johnny writes his homework at the kitchen table, and stops suddenly, and asks his father who happens to walk by:

Dad, do you write 'penis' with one 'n' or with two 'n's?

His father, quite surprised, thinks for a moment.

Son, just put three 'n's, it can't be long enough.