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Joke A Day's Military Jokes

Joke A Day's Military Jokes


Joke A Day's Military Jokes -- "Honest, General, I didn't put that daffodil in your ass. But your ass does make a nice vase, sir." more>> Save $$$ by buying all three books: Lawyer Jokes, Military Jokes, and Salesmen Jokes for only $12! Buy all nine Joke A Day e-books for only $30!

All Joke A Day e-books contain MATURE MATERIAL and are not meant for those easily offended.

Each zip file contains e-books in the Palm OS format, Microsoft Reader LIT, and Adobe PDF files. Just unzip and load the one you need!

Joke Samples

One night, my husband brought home his Navy sub buddies for dinner. They'd all had big grins on their faces and I could tell something was going on, but no one would tell me.

When they all left, I asked my husband what was the joke.

He said, During the test today, the instructor read the questions and we were to write down the answers. When he asked, Who can initiate an emergency blow? I answered out loud, My wife can.

We had to take a 15 minute break so he could quit laughing.


Not sure how it ever got started, but a tradition in the Navy is all of the pilots dance with the Wing Commander's wife. I walked over at a dance once and asked if she'd like to dance and she said, I don't dance with a child.

I smiled, bowed, and replied, Oh! I'm sorry. If I would have known your condition, I wouldn't have asked.


During the Vietnam War, a Lieutenant asked a Marine why he was falling back during a really fierce battle. Didn't you hear me say that we're outnumbered 4 to 1?

The Marine replied, I got my four, Sir.

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Added: 2009-03-11 License: Commercial Price: 5
14 downloads
Joke A Day's Lawyer Jokes

Joke A Day's Lawyer Jokes


Joke A Day's Lawyer Jokes -- Briefly, we make a case that the only time a lawyer is lying is when he's moving his lips, your honor. more>> Save $$$ by buying all three books: Lawyer Jokes, Military Jokes, and Salesmen Jokes for only $12! Buy all nine Joke A Day e-books for only $30!

All Joke A Day e-books contain MATURE MATERIAL and are not meant for those easily offended.

Each zip file contains e-books in the Palm OS format, Microsoft Reader LIT, and Adobe PDF files. Just unzip and load the one you need!

Joke Samples

A woman and her little girl were visiting the grave of the little girl's grandmother. On their way through the cemetery back to the car, the little girl asked, Mommy, do they ever bury two people in the same grave?

Of course not, dear, replied the mother. Why would you think that?

The tombstone back there said, Here lies a lawyer and an honest man.


A man walked into a lawyer's office and inquired about the lawyer's rates.

$50.00 for three questions, replied the lawyer.

Isn't that awfully steep? asked the man.

Yes, the lawyer replied, and what was your third question?


Two lawyers were walking down the street when they saw a beautiful blonde. The first one said, How'd you like to fuck that?

The second one said, Out of what?

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Added: 2009-03-11 License: Commercial Price: 5
14 downloads
Turnkey Site - Jokes Site

Turnkey Site - Jokes Site


Ready-to-go Turnkey Websites with php MYSQL scripts. more>> Welcome to SecureNetServer.net

We are glad you took your valuable time to select the Right Downloadable Software Product. If you need any assistance please click on our "Live Help". We'll be glad to guide you through your online selection and ordering experience.

Ready-to-go Turnkey Websites with php MYSQL scripts. Compatible with CPANEL host.

You can customize the look of your site by simply adding your own logos etc. All you need is a domain name and hosting.

ONCE SETUP, THESE WEBSITES RUN ON THEIR OWN! They are built to work with Paypal, they sell for $50.00 each, sometimes more.

They also have their own admin section where you can maintain your site.

I set a image hosting site in just 10 minutes! Just imagine, for 10 minutes of work you could have a fully working website from a huge list of options and if you don't have time to run it ... sell it! Make $$$.

Some "established" websites being sold today are nothing more than turn-key websites that have been hosted, and have easily sold for $150.00+ EACH!

Thanks Again!
PLEASE NOTE - There is a No Refund Policy for this Product. Due to the Nature of the Order Processing and Shipping we could not retrieve the software back, sold as is!

Visit Our Website @ Internet LiveHelp

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Added: -0001-11-30 License: Commercial Price: 20.00
14 downloads
 
Other version of Turnkey Site - Jokes Site
Turnkey Site - Jokes SiteInstant Cash Downloads - Turnkey Site - Jokes
Price: 20.00
License:Commercial
Download
13 downloads
Added: -0001-11-30
Joke A Day's Salesmen Jokes

Joke A Day's Salesmen Jokes


Joke A Day's Salesmen Jokes -- This traveling salesmen, two rabbis, and a hippo walk into a bar . . . more>> Save $$$ by buying all three books: Lawyer Jokes, Military Jokes, and Salesmen Jokes for only $12! Buy all nine Joke A Day e-books for only $30!

All Joke A Day e-books contain MATURE MATERIAL and are not meant for those easily offended.

Each zip file contains e-books in the Palm OS format, Microsoft Reader LIT, and Adobe PDF files. Just unzip and load the one you need!

Joke Samples

A blonde went to the appliance store sale and found a bargain.

I would like to buy this TV, she told the salesman. Sorry, we don't sell to blondes, he replied.

She hurried home and dyed her hair, then came back and again told the salesman I would like to buy this TV.

Sorry, we don't sell to blondes, he replied.

Darn, he recognized me, she thought. She went for a complete disguise this time: haircut and new color, new outfit, big sunglasses, and then waited a few days before she again approached the salesman. I would like to buy this TV.

Sorry, we don't sell to blondes, he replied.

Frustrated, she exclaimed, How do you know I'm a blonde?

Because that's a microwave, he replied.


Sign in an office: We shoot every third salesman. The 2nd done just left.
A salesman is talking to a farmer when he looks over and sees a rooster wearing pants, a shirt, and suspenders. He says, What the hell is that all about?

The farmer says, We had a fire in the chicken coop and all his feathers got singed off, so the wife made him some clothes to keep him warm. There ain't nothing funnier than watching him trying to hold down a hen with one foot and get his pants down with the other.

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Added: 2009-03-11 License: Commercial Price: 5
13 downloads
MomSoft Jokes Screensaver 2.0

MomSoft Jokes Screensaver 2.0


A full featured Windows 95/98 Screen Saver. The Screen saver is fully configu... more>> A full featured Windows 95/98 Screen Saver. The Screen saver is fully configurable and includes a collection of "clean" Joke files which are used by the program to present them attractively on your computer<<less
Download (629KB)
Added: 2002-11-29 License: Freeware Price: $19
2520 downloads
Joke A Day's Little Johnny Jokes

Joke A Day's Little Johnny Jokes


Joke A Day's Little Johnny Jokes -- Before Dennis the Menace and way nastier than Bart Simpson, there was Little Johnny raising hell and Little Susie's skirts. more>> Get the entire Nasty Collection: Nasty Jokes 1 and 2 and Little Johnny Jokes for only $12. Buy all nine Joke A Day e-books for only $30!

All Joke A Day e-books contain MATURE MATERIAL and are not meant for those easily offended.

Each zip file contains e-books in the Palm OS format, Microsoft Reader LIT, and Adobe PDF files. Just unzip and load the one you need!

Joke Samples

A Sunday school teacher asked her class, Does anyone know Jesus' Mother's name?

Susie raised her hand and said, It was Mary. The teacher said, Very good Susie. Do you know Jesus' Father's name?

Little Johnny said, Yes, it was Verg. The teacher asked how he came up with that answer. He said, You know, Verg 'n Mary.


Mr. Dickson asked his 4th graders one day if anyone knew how to put 2 holes into 1 hole. Since no one was able to answer the question, he told the kids to go home and ask their fathers.

They came back the next day and still no one knew the answer. Look, said Mr. Dickson while holding his index finger against his thumb, forming a little zero. This is one hole, my nose has 2 holes, and I can put my hand over my nose and make my nose holes appear inside this other hole.

Aaaaaaahhhhhh, said the children. The next day, Little Johnny stood up and said, Mr. Dickson, my daddy wants to know if you know how to put 7 holes in 1 hole.

Hmmmm, he thought, How can you put 7 holes in 1? Well, I'll be darned; I don't know how to do that. Um, did your father tell you how to?

Yes, said Little Johnny, You take a flute and shove it up your ass!


Little Johnny had a class about sexuality, and his new teacher gave him some homework about it.

Little Johnny writes his homework at the kitchen table, and stops suddenly, and asks his father who happens to walk by:

Dad, do you write 'penis' with one 'n' or with two 'n's?

His father, quite surprised, thinks for a moment.

Son, just put three 'n's, it can't be long enough.

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Added: 2009-03-11 License: Commercial Price: 5
11 downloads
Dropheads

Dropheads


Exciting puzzle game with hilarious more>>

Exciting puzzle game with the following features:

- unique combination of great gameplay and extreme fun
- smiley characters with hilarious animations
- additional bonus and surprise game to solve
- two different gameplay styles for a single one-time price
- classic puzzle game with mind-challenging levels
- faster-paced chill out game with easier levels
- collect all 5 treasure chests while exploring secret islands
- animated easy-to-grasp tutorials on every single feature
- 30-day unconditional money back guarantee

Dropheads with hilarious animations keep falling from the top and you should clear them before they get too high. Expect the situation getting a bit more complicated when various special elements appear, so think twice before you make your next step...

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Added: -0001-11-30 License: Commercial Price: 15.99
89 downloads
Joke A Day's Nasty Jokes (Volume 1)

Joke A Day's Nasty Jokes (Volume 1)


Joke A Day's Nasty Jokes (Volume 1) -- Are you easily offended? Do you shudder at "non-politically correct humor?" Then bite me. This ain't for you, numbnuts. more>> Get the entire Nasty Collection: Nasty Jokes 1 and 2 and Little Johnny Jokes for only $12. Buy all nine Joke A Day e-books for only $30!

All Joke A Day e-books contain MATURE MATERIAL and are not meant for those easily offended.

Each zip file contains e-books in the Palm OS format, Microsoft Reader LIT, and Adobe PDF files. Just unzip and load the one you need!

Joke Samples

This Chinese guy walks into a bar. There's a black bartender tending bar. The Chinese guy says, "Ahh, give me a jigger, nigger."

Naturally, this pisses off the black man something terrible. "Yo, asshole, I didn't appreciate that. How'd you like it if I wuz da customah and I came in here and said something derogatory to yer yeller ass? How would YOU feel, Jack?"

The Chinese guy thinks for a moment, says, "Hokay. Sounds like deal to me." He grabs the black man's rag from his hand, *jumps* over the bar, and says, "Now, you go outside, come back in, say something stupid, and we'll see how I feel."

The black guy walks out from behind the bar, out the door, lets the door close. Three seconds later, he struts back thru the same door, walks up the counter, and addresses the Chinese guy. "Yo, Chink, give me a drink."

The Chinese guy says, "Ahh, so sorry, we don't serve niggers here."


Two necrophiles work in a morgue, and one of them tells the other one: "You should have seen this woman they brought in last week. They pulled her out of the water after she'd been there for three weeks. Man, I'm tellin' you, she had a clitoris just like a pickle."

"What," the other asks, "green?"

"No, says the first, "sour."


The firemen finally get a huge fire under control, and Chief Mattea has all of his men accounted for except Olson and Rosolino. After a few minutes' search, the chief looks down an alley, and there's Rosolino, leaning over a trash can. His pants are down to his ankles, and Olson is banging away from behind.

Chief Mattea says, "What the hell is going on?"

Olson says, "Rosolino passed out from smoke inhalation."

The chief says, "Smoke inhalation? You're supposed to give him mouth-to-mouth resuscitation!"

Olson says, "I did, Chief. That's how this shit got started."

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Added: 2009-03-11 License: Commercial Price: 5
13 downloads
Joke A Day's Church Jokes Collection

Joke A Day's Church Jokes Collection


Joke A Day's Church Jokes (All Three Volumes!) Jesus Christ, get your one way ticket straight to hell with the collection of all THREE Joke A Day Church Joke Volumes! more>> All Joke A Day e-books contain MATURE MATERIAL and are not meant for those easily offended.Each zip file contains e-books in the Palm OS format, Microsoft Reader LIT, and Adobe PDF files. Just unzip and load the one you need!<<less
Added: 2009-03-11 License: Commercial Price: 12
14 downloads
Joke A Day's Church Jokes (Volume 1)

Joke A Day's Church Jokes (Volume 1)


Joke A Day's Church Jokes (Volume 1) -- Oh, we're going to hell. Come along for the ride. more>> Save $$$ by buying Church Jokes 1, 2, and 3 for only $12! Buy all nine Joke A Day e-books for only $30!

All Joke A Day e-books contain MATURE MATERIAL and are not meant for those easily offended.

Each zip file contains e-books in the Palm OS format, Microsoft Reader LIT, and Adobe PDF files. Just unzip and load the one you need!

Joke Samples

A drunk was staggering down the main street of town. Somehow, he managed to make it up the stairs to the cathedral and into the building, where he crashed from pew to pew, finally making his way to a side aisle and into a confessional.

A priest who had been observing the man's sorry progress and figuring the fellow was in need of some assistance, proceeded to enter his side of the confessional. But, his attention was rewarded only by a lengthy silence.

Finally he asked, May I help you, my son?

I dunno, came the drunk's voice from behind the partition. You got any toilet paper on your side?


Four Catholic mothers are sitting around bragging about their sons, each of whom is a priest. First mother says, My son is a monsignor, and when he walks in the room, people greet him, Good morning, monsignor.

Second mother says, Well, my son is a Bishop, and people greet him, Good morning, your Grace.

Third mother says, Well, my son is a Cardinal, and people greet him, Good morning, your Eminence.

The fourth mother pauses, and finally says, My son is six feet, ten inches tall and is 300 pounds of pure muscle. When he walks in the room, people greet him, Oh, My God!


Offerings had been down the past several Sundays and the preacher decided he had to do something to change the trend. The next Sunday, as the plate was being passed, he said, Brothers and Sisters, I don't like to have to do this, but there is a man in the congregation who is having an affair with another parishioner's wife, and if there is not at least five dollars in the collection, I will reveal his name.

Later, as he counted the money, he found 20 five-dollar bills, and a two-dollar bill with a note that read, Forever hold your peace, I'll have that other three dollars before sundown.

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Added: 2009-03-11 License: Commercial Price: 5
13 downloads
Bling-O 1.0

Bling-O 1.0


Aim for the big money as you watch your chips bounce around on their way to landing your fortune. Be careful, if you get too greedy you might go bust! 4 unique ways to play, a hilarious host, and more>> Aim for the big money as you watch your chips bounce around on their way to landing your fortune. Be careful, if you get too greedy you might go bust! 4 unique ways to play, a hilarious host, and loads of special bonuses add to the fun.<<less
Download (208k)
Added: 2008-11-08 License: Commercial Price: $14.99
352 downloads
Training Tools 4.0

Training Tools 4.0


Computer Training and Presentation Programs more>> Milori Training Tools is a suite of applications that should be in every computer trainers toolbox. The three programs within this suite can transform a so-so presentation into an outstanding one. The first program, PC Chalkboard, is known as the "John Madden" tool by its users because it actually allows you to draw on top of other running applications, marking up the application as John Madden would mark up an NFL play. You can create circles, rectangles, arrows, lines and even highlight with a full palette of colors and various line widths. You can quickly clear the markings with a single keystroke. The second program, MagLens, allows you to magnify icons and toolbar buttons from 100 percent to 600 percent in a resizable rectangular or elliptical window (have you ever see one of those?). You can pause the window to freeze a portion of an application while talking about it with your audience. The third application, Finger Prince, allows you to "cue up" the enhancements you will need during your presentation and makes them available at a keystroke. Play canned laughter after your bad jokes, create instant applause, launch Help documents or web sites with ease or even use a talking clock to speak the time in a human-like voice at the beginning of your breaks!<<less
Download (2390k)
Added: 2008-10-24 License: Commercial Price:
370 downloads
TrayNote Plus 5.3a

TrayNote Plus 5.3a


Internet enabled sticky notepad more>> NEW! TrayNote Plus is the first Internet Enabled Sticky Pad! Dont lose that important e-mail address, phone number, web page address, or even a good joke EVER again! Experience the ultimate in convenience with your very own personal notepad which resides in your system tray -- right next to your clock. But, this is no ordinary notepad! Simply jot down a note or address, and when you return later, just double-click on the address and the e-mail program or web browser loads with that address. Add TrayNote Plus to your arsenal of time saving and productivity-boosting tools. -- Try it FREE today! Version 5.0 is new and improved and loaded with office environment networking features, total customizability -- even in your own language, and many new features! Try it today!
Imagine how much time *YOU* will save with a tool like this --- when you need to keep track of URLs for research, or need a quick list of phone numbers or extension numbers -- or perhaps need quick access to a list of e-mail addresses you use often! And whenever you need this information, its available immediately in just one click! TrayNote Plus is the perfect tool for the busy professional, or Internet-savvy home user. Try it today! Visit us at http://www.amfsoftware.com
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Download (2.4M)
Added: 2008-10-24 License: Commercial Price: $24.00
364 downloads
JunkMail Cop

JunkMail Cop


Say Goodbye to Spam, E-mail Worms & Viruses - Save your money, reduce time and bandwidth wasted dealing with irritating spam or junk e-mail messages more>> "Say Goodbye to Spam, E-mail Worms & Viruses"
- Save your money, reduce time and bandwidth wasted dealing with irritating spam or junk e-mail messages.
- Protect your PC from fatal e-mail worms and e-mail viruses attack.
- Prevent offensive material from entering your organization or PC.
- Less stress, frustration and clutter. More time for productive and fun things.
JunkMail Cop scans your e-mail and moves all spam (adult content offers, chain letters, jokes, image files, e-mail worms and viruses, harassment and threats, e-mail bombs, etc) to a special folder before you download it. This software compares incoming messages to our huge database of all existing junk e-mails (keyword, subject, header, etc) to find if there is a positive match.
JunkMail Cop does not download the entire message. It is much quicker than using your normal e-mail program which will actually have to retrieve the entire message including any attachments. This will dramatically reduce your bandwidth usage and internet monthly cost.
Your satisfaction is 100% guaranteed. Today's bargain price cannot continue forever. Current prices should be regarded as temporary. Order JunkMail Cop today!
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Added: -0001-11-30 License: Commercial Price: 19.95
14 downloads
Joke A Day's Sampler

Joke A Day's Sampler


Joke A Day's Sampler is our five best selling single volumes: Lawyer Jokes, Little Johnny Jokes, Military Jokes, Church Jokes (Volume 1), and Nasty Jokes (Volume 1.) Lots of laughs for a little jack! more>> All Joke A Day e-books contain MATURE MATERIAL and are not meant for those easily offended.

Each zip file contains e-books in the Palm OS format, Microsoft Reader LIT, and Adobe PDF files. Just unzip and load the one you need!

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Added: 2009-03-11 License: Commercial Price: 20
10 downloads
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hilarious jokes in All Software

110 Hilarious Jokes 1.0


An ebook filled with 110 hilarious jokes with free give away rights. Need content for your site? Then this is the ebook for you

Extra Funny Jokes 0,1


E-spaces - jokes and selected nothing but the funniest and most hilarious jokes for you. Extra Funny Jokes

Jokes!!


Ronald Bell - Jokes!! Jokes! gives you quick access to a collection of fun and hilarious jokes with the tap of a button. Next time youre at a pa... Jokes!! Jokes! gives you quick access to

Jokes!! 1.0


Ronald Bell - Jokes! gives you quick access to a collection of fun and hilarious jokes with the tap of a button. Jokes!! Jokes! gives you quick access to a collection of fun and hilarious

Dating Jokes 1.1


rise uP! Labs - You will find an assortment of funny and hilarious dating jokes in this app. All jokes have been ... selected from the funniest jokes on the Internet